On top of that, I've been rather crabby lately, and when I'm crabby I don't feel much like (typing) writing. I'm seeing a therapist (have been since October-ish) but I still haven't worked out this random anger. Anger is a strong word....its not that strong of a feeling.....I appear to be mourning my freedom (i.e. pre-baby days) and I can't seem to quite let it go yet. Or maybe its not that - maybe its more dealing with guilt that he's in daycare and I'm working - or guilt that I enjoy the break from him while he's at daycare? I dunno. Like I said, I'm trying to work it out. Last session I felt really good about life and where I am right now, so I'm making progress. Pat's doing great dealing with me while I'm trying to deal with these emotions and does a lot for the baby/housework areas, so that definitely helps. On top of that, I started my period last week, so those hormones certainly didn't help anything either.
*sigh* I suppose this is all part of the transition into parenthood? I hope it goes away.....having those kinds of feelings hanging over my head certainly makes being a parent not fun for me. In all honesty, days are mostly good - but some days - like today - its just hard. And its not because Liam is difficult at all - on the contrary, he's a great baby. Sleeps pretty well, he's happy and smiley and talkative - he's so easy to love!
I started Weight Watchers last week. Pat's doing it unofficially as well. We've been doing pretty well - definitely stepped up the veggie and fruit intake! That's always my downfall. I just don't like the green stuff. My first weigh in was 5.4 pounds down - whooo hoo! I've got about 30 more to go, so it will be a slow and steady process. I would like for this time the weight to stay off....no more of this up and down crapola. Enough already with that - the past 10 years has been up & down, up & down. We're gonna take it down this time, and keep it there. I want to be an AFTER - not a before!
In Lions news.......its so depressing! They played well today and should have won, but alas the dumb ol' Cowboys prevailed with a stellar drive. Boo. Oh well, at least I got a pic of my boys in their gear!
And, here's a pic of Liam after the game....*sigh* I don't blame you buddy, I don't blame you one bit. I wanted them to win too.
Funny note - Liam's becoming much more aware of his surroundings, being scared by loud noises and such. Hence, throughout the game, when greeted with an over enthusiastic shout of grief/disbelief/happiness/cheer from Pat - Liam promptly stuck out his bottom lip and started to cry. It's pretty cute actually. That little pout gets me every time!
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