Sunday, July 26, 2009

Learning how to fly

Liam and I were walking around the neighborhood this evening when we saw the coolest thing :) A new bird taking it's first flight. Well, I'm not sure if it was it's first flight EVER, but that's what I'm calling it in my head. We stopped for a good two minutes (which in Liam minutes is about an hour) and just watched him in the tree, flitting about, looking so very relieved that it landed safely in a tree. You could still see a bit of baby bird fluff on its head and neck, and even a bit of uncertainty in its eyes, not sure exactly what is coming next, but excited... I couldn't believe that Liam was so interested - like he knew it was something cool and special.

OK, maybe I'm reading a bit too much into it all, but it certainly was neat-o.

And fitting - especially since I'm embarking on a new adventure as of this evening. Pat went on a business trip, and Liam and I are flying solo for a couple of days - first time in the new house! Not a big deal to most people, but kind of a big deal to me. I'm a wuss. I don't do well in new places. I don't like being alone. Typically when Pat leaves I stay up way way LATE (like 2AM) until I can't possibly keep my eyes open anymore, and only then can I sleep. That's OK for one night. Not for multiple nights. Definitely not OK for a 5:30-6AM toddler wake up call that Daddy takes care of 90% of the time. Yeah, I really don't like doing all the work myself. Especially when I'm knocked up, vulnerable and whiney.

I thought I might go camping while Pat was gone, but that didn't work out because my body does not cooperate with the un-cushy-ness of camp chairs, not to mention the 6 hour drive. Then I thought I might enlist my cousin and kiddo to come stay with us...but then I realized that request is a little ridiculous. Its like asking someone to babysit yourself (thanks A, for not saying so at the time). Alas, I am an adult, it is my home and I think I've been here long enough where I can handle it on my own.

I think.

*le sigh*

The hardest part of this process is admiting my co-dependancy. Aformentioned cousin A says its OK to rely on each other when you're in a marriage. I suppose she's right. It just takes some getting used to admiting it all...

No comments: